Life gets busy, and sometimes weeks or months can go by without seeing loved ones. The holidays are a great time to reconnect with friends and family, especially grandparents. If your grandparents are living in assisted living nearby, you may bring them home with you for a party or dinner – or maybe you just arrange some extra time to see them in their home community. If you can spend some extra time with your elderly loved ones this year, we recommend that you spend some time asking them questions about their life.
You may be surprised at just how little you know about your family members lives before they were elderly – and now is a great time to hear and document the stories. You may even consider filming them as they answer these questions. It will make a wonderful gift for the entire family.
What were you like when you were young?
We don’t tend to think of our grandparents as young people, but they led full lives full of the same triumphs, disappointments, hopes and dreams that we all have. They are also a treasure trove for funny, touching or revelatory stories. Here are some sample questions to start the stories flowing:
- Where did you grow up? What was your house like?
- What were your parents names? What did they do for a living?
- Which invention or tech innovation from your lifetime was the most impactful? What was life like before those things were available?
- What were your hobbies growing up? How did you spend your days?
- What were you like as a child – mischievous, studious, adventurous?
- What was your best friend’s name? What is a favorite memory you shared with them?
- Did you like school? What was your favorite subject?
- What was your first job?
Tell me more about our family history!
Learning more about the family can provide a deep sense of legacy and connection. But most people don’t know much about their family history. Be sure to ask about your ancestry, as far as they know.
- Do you know the history of your family name? Where is the family originally from?
- Are there any notorious characters or famous people in our family line?
- What do you remember about your parents and grandparents?
- Did our family have a business or occupation that you all participated in?
- What was it like being my Mom’s parent? Did she cause trouble? Tell me a funny story about her.
What would you like to impart to us about a life well-lived?
Most people who have lived seven, eight, or nine decades have a wealth of knowledge and experience to share, so few people ask about it. Don’t let this wisdom go to waste!
- What are some of the most essential life lessons you can impart?
- Who had the most influence over you in your life?
- Is there any age or time you wish you could change or do-over? Would you like to be young again?
Get to know them on a deep level.
Grandparents are often beloved but rarely known well. Don’t let another day go by without asking them to share their heart and soul with you.
- What was the best day of your life?
- What are you the most proud of in your life?
- What makes you happiest now?
- Do you feel you reached your dreams? How can I help you to achieve your goals?
- How would you like your family to remember you someday? What do you want future generations to know about you?
Don’t let this holiday season go by without getting to know your family like you never did before. And be sure to document everything in a book or video – your kids will thank you for it.
My Care Finders is a professional senior placement agency that works with families seeking quality care and residential support for their loved ones.
